Friday, October 22, 2010

Stephanie on Auto-Pilot (Yes, I Have that Feature Installed)

This week has quite literally been a blur to me. I've been running solely on autopilot, which is, I guess, a good thing. I missed my Monday classes because I was incapable of staying awake for more than a few minutes at a time, then managed to fight sleep successfully enough to make it to work and class on Tuesday. By Wednesday, the side effects had lessened enough that I wasn't fighting sleep quite as much. Instead, I had vertigo and queasiness to fight. How fun (note the sarcasm)! Yesterday and today have been about the same as Wednesday. To be safe, I have been getting rides from my roommate and one of my close friends rather than trying to drive. That's one of my hard and fast rules: I DO NOT drive when I am under heavy medicinal influence. Getting somewhere is NEVER worth accidentally injuring or killing someone else.

Despite the heavy influence of these awful side effects, I've still managed to accomplish a fair amount. I suppose years of forcing myself to keep going with migraines or injuries has made me resourceful and tough. I've gotten all of my coursework done on time, even Monday's work (which I sent to class with my roommate). Sidhe Eyes, my novel-in-progress, has now reached eleven completed chapters and is close to 150 pages long (even longer than my theses will be). I just finished doing a massive project as work, which "the powers that be" are very happy with. And, I also managed not to embarrass myself at my Confirmation (which took place last Sunday). Huzzah!

Now, if I can just manage to pull off another stellar week of work on auto-pilot. The side effects are still going strong, and I have two book reviews, two presentations, and a frightening quiz to prepare for. I also have my writing group (Inklings III) and a Lantern Hollow Press meeting (today and tomorrow, respectively). 'Tis going to be a very un-restful weekend!

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"Passage—immediate passage! the blood burns in my veins! Away, O soul! hoist instantly the anchor!
Cut the hawsers—haul out—shake out every sail!
Have we not stood here like trees in the ground long enough?
Have we not grovell’d here long enough, eating and drinking like mere brutes?
Have we not darken’d and dazed ourselves with books long enough?

Sail forth! steer for the deep waters only!
Reckless, O soul, exploring, I with thee, and thou with me;
For we are bound where mariner has not yet dared to go, And we will risk the ship, ourselves and all.

O my brave soul!
O farther, farther sail!
O daring joy, but safe! Are they not all the seas of God?
O farther, farther, farther sail!"

~Walt Whitman, "Passage to India"